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  1. #1
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    Unhappy 47yo, married, two kids, full time job, health issues - help!

    So quick intro, I'm 47 years old, happily married, I have two children (girls 13/17) and work full time as a software salesperson (no activity, 9 hours at a desk). I'm 6'2" and 240lbs, 29% BMI. I have sleep apnea (recent issue), significant memory issues (stress, health issues, explained later), back problems, heart problems, migraines, fatigue, and overall lack of motivation. I used to do 24 hour mountain bike races and centuries, but haven't done so in several years (and was never really a good weight even with all of the exercising). During my late 30's and early 40's, my wife almost died from cancer and went through several surgeries and treatments, around the same time my youngest daughter (who has Down syndrome) was diagnosed with a systemic inflammatory disease. So all of this is a set up to me joining the forums...

    I NEED to change, but find it so hard to find the time since my wife and I do all we can to help get my daughter to her speech appointments, doctor appointments, and school activities (for both of my daughters). My wife works until 6PM M, W, TH and I work 5 days 8-5. We are both worn out and don't have a lot of time for other activities (no working out for 2 hours in the afternoon, or able to wake up at 4:40 to go work out.

    What advice would you provide? (Please, through your own experience) I've had 20-something year olds tell me to just go work out and tell your wife it is more important than other life events. But in reality, it isn't that easy. My goal is to drop weight, be healthy, reduce my sleep apnea, reduce stress, and have more energy and happiness. I know there is no magic pill, but what has worked for you who have been in a similar position?

  2. #2
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    What is your diet like?


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    Default 47yo, married, two kids, full time job, health issues - help!

    Ie do you eat a lot of refined carbs, bread, white pasta etc, sugar either table or additive in Ďfat freeí products.. I have sleep apnea too which can wipe out your energy but sugar will not help the situation. Try quitting all forms of additive sugar and table sugar and eat only whole foods that contain natural sugar (these will also contain fibre to slow down the digestion of fructose so it doesnít get stored as fat).

    I have two kids and a wife and Iím self employed so time is also my enemy. I work out for 1 hour 3 to 4 times a week if I can, get to gym for 6:30am and get to work for 7:45am.

    Iíve just started Intermittent Fasting where you fast 16 hours and eat 8.. but most of the 16 hours is during sleep. Say say you eat between 12 noon and 8pm and you fast the rest. You can read more here: leangains.com.


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    Last edited by plumbjay; 04-11-2018 at 01:29 PM.

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    Glad you asked, sorry, I forgot that little bit of info!

    I don't drink, not religious or anything, I just don't like alcohol. I might have a beer every few weeks or something.

    My wife usually cooks and makes somewhat healthy meals; no red meat, mostly chicken and fish and salads. She usually incorporates veggies into every meal (broccoli, asparagus, cauliflower, etc). Sometimes we have wild rice with meals, or potatoes.

    We try to eat fruits and veggies for snacks, but we also cheat and have chocolate chips for snacks sometimes when we are bad, or have ice cream. However, we are mostly good with only snacking on almonds, Wheat Thins, etc.

    Breakfast I usually had Honey Nut Cheerios with Honey Corn FLakes mixed in and using Almond milk (I think I am allergic to milk). But I have recently began making eggs for breakfast with salsa and avocados.

    Lunch is usually mini chicken street tacos with chicken, corn tortillas, and green sauce (no cheese or sourcream), or I will make a sandwhich with deli meats, multi-nut bread, mayo, and a slice of cheese and avocado.

    I don't drink a lot of soda, maybe 1 Coke a week, and I try to drink a lot of water. But Apple Juice and Orange Juice are my downfall if they are in the house, i drink them.

    So overall, not a bad diet I think, maybe a few extra calories, but not extreme.

    The only bad thing is my Grande Latte Macchiatto with an extra shot at Starbucks, once or twice a day!

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    I also tried the fasting thing, did a couple of 72 hour fasts (for health reasons - h t t p s ://news.usc.edu/63669/fasting-triggers-stem-cell-regeneration-of-damaged-old-immune-system/ ) I try to do an 18 hour fast every now and then as well.
    Last edited by apensity; 04-11-2018 at 01:57 PM.

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    Default 47yo, married, two kids, full time job, health issues - help!

    Quote Originally Posted by apensity View Post
    Glad you asked, sorry, I forgot that little bit of info!

    I don't drink, not religious or anything, I just don't like alcohol. I might have a beer every few weeks or something.

    My wife usually cooks and makes somewhat healthy meals; no red meat, mostly chicken and fish and salads. She usually incorporates veggies into every meal (broccoli, asparagus, cauliflower, etc). Sometimes we have wild rice with meals, or potatoes.

    We try to eat fruits and veggies for snacks, but we also cheat and have chocolate chips for snacks sometimes when we are bad, or have ice cream. However, we are mostly good with only snacking on almonds, Wheat Thins, etc.

    Breakfast I usually had Honey Nut Cheerios with Honey Corn FLakes mixed in and using Almond milk (I think I am allergic to milk). But I have recently began making eggs for breakfast with salsa and avocados.

    Lunch is usually mini chicken street tacos with chicken, corn tortillas, and green sauce (no cheese or sourcream), or I will make a sandwhich with deli meats, multi-nut bread, mayo, and a slice of cheese and avocado.

    I don't drink a lot of soda, maybe 1 Coke a week, and I try to drink a lot of water. But Apple Juice and Orange Juice are my downfall if they are in the house, i drink them.

    So overall, not a bad diet I think, maybe a few extra calories, but not extreme.

    The only bad thing is my Grande Latte Macchiatto with an extra shot at Starbucks, once or twice a day!
    Your diet ainít bad at all. If you want to lose weight you need a calorie defecit of about 500kcal per day.

    Work out you BMR (calorific requirement to function everyday) and then your TDEE (total calorific requirement if you can get to work out) and then deduct 500 from that number and aim to eat this number of calories on days you exercise.

    muscleandstrength.com/tools/bmr-calculator

    Have a read of the Flexible diet too:
    muscleandstrength.com/diet-plans/iifym-flexible-dieting-diet

    Apparently HIIT is great for fat loss and overall fitness but check this article out comparing low and high intensity cardio for fat loss and cardiovascular health:
    muscleandstrength.com/articles/fat-loss-hiit-steady-state-cardio

    Hope all this helps mate!



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    Last edited by plumbjay; 04-12-2018 at 01:24 AM.

  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by plumbjay View Post
    Your diet ainít bad at all. If you want to lose weight you need a calorie defecit of about 500kcal per day.

    Work out you BMR (calorific requirement to function everyday) and then your TDEE (total calorific requirement if you can get to work out) and then deduct 500 from that number and aim to eat this number of calories on days you exercise.
    I tried this for a couple of months a few years ago and I wasn't losing weight. I tracked my food religiously through an app as well as my daily caloric expenditure. Because I wasn't losing weight I did some research and found a link from cortisol production from long-term stress and its correlation to reduced weight loss from calorie deficit dieting. So the key was to reduce stress. But I have no control over major illness and job related stress rather than mediation, increasing exercise, or quitting my job. My motivation has been -20% (less than nothing) over the past few years as I just feel worked over by life. However, I am trying to get some back so I can increase my exercise regimen and build more motivation and energy. I would think that every one of my doctors telling me I need to exercise more because of my heart, weight, memory, energy, and sleep apnea would have been motivation enough, but they don't understand how stubborn (stupid) I can be. ;^)

    Thanks for the other links, I'll look into those as well.

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    Hey apensity,

    Your problem is common, try not to stress over it.

    My suggestion would be to find a way to workout that doesn't seem like a workout to you. But basically you just need a find a way to stay active that doesn't fee like working out to you.
    Last edited by Doug; 04-24-2018 at 03:31 AM. Reason: Advertising link deleted

 

 

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